Should You Perform At Your Wedding?


A wedding day includes many rehearsed elements with the bride in the spotlight for most of the day. With the ceremony, reception entrance and first dance, there are many aspects of performance in a wedding. Some couples rehearse and choreograph a dance number (sometimes involving the whole wedding party), write their own poems or vows and even perform a musical number.

Choreographed dance numbers for a first dance idea are a great way to surprise the crowd and get everyone raring to go on the dance floor. Just search YouTube and you’ll find many examples of good (and sometimes bad) surprise performances from adventurous bride and grooms. Your performance doesn’t have to be a show-stopping music and dance number, but is it cheesy or even tacky to perform at your own wedding?

Traditionally, the bride isn’t even supposed to make a speech at the wedding (seems rather old fashioned now after all the work modern brides put into their big day!) but depending on how traditional your wedding is, or how intimate, you may want to find a fun way to make a grand finale. Here are a few things to consider when thinking about performing at your wedding:

1. Avoid turning the night into a cabaret

You may have musical talents, and perhaps your friends and family do too, but that doesn’t mean the night should turn into an endless sing-a-long or group dance lesson. A song or two performed by you or someone close makes a romantic statement, but keep it short and sweet, as the rest of your guests might not be so keen.

2. Don’t fret over it

You may love the idea of performing on your wedding day, but if you’re in any way uncomfortable or nervous then don’t do it. Don’t make it something else you have to worry about, or fret over the whole day, if you don’t have to. Only  perform if you’re confident and comfortable singing, playing or dancing in front of a crowd.

3. Leave it to the pros if you have to

Everyone has good intentions when it comes to performing, but unfortunately not everyone has amazing talent. If it’s something you really want to do, but you’re unsure of your talents, then consider taking a few lessons beforehand. Or if there’s a song or dance you really love, have a friend or professional perform it for you or help you along. You could even find other ways to incorporate your love for music and dance into your wedding, by having a music-themed wedding with creative decorations, props or playlists.

4. Choose something special

The most important thing is that your performance should mean something and not just be an ego booster. Choose a song that means something to you as a couple. Performing to, or with, the love of your life may end up being one of the most special moments of the day.

Photo one: Green Wedding Shoes; Photo Two:; Photo two;

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2 Comments  |  Filed Under: Small Wedding Ideas, Wedding Planning, Wedding Reception

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  1. Posted by Kristine@ Orchard Bliss on April 29th, 2013 at 9:46pm

    I think its ok to perform at your own wedding but definitely keep in mind some if the points you have highlighted - practice first, don't make it a long drawn out performance and do something meaningful to you as a couple. I also suggest keeping it a surprise as much as possible so you can wow the guests.
  2. Posted by DavetteB on November 15th, 2014 at 10:49am

    As a dance instructor, I think couples should invest in getting their first dance choreographed, and not just because it keeps us employed :-) Many of the couples that have come to me have said that they didn't want to have their video by 5 minutes of step and sway. That gets old for the viewers as well. Some of the guys that were dragged (or bribed) into lessons, usually ended up having fun and loving it! I don't mean competitive level dancing; just something that moves around the floor. Knowing what you are doing also makes it Less nerve-racking.

    (I admit I'm biased; I'd rather have a large dance floor over sit-down catering - our family dances.)

    I've seen some beautiful bride or groom vocal solos that were truly breathtaking, but that isn't for everyone. I admire those that can; I think my emotions would overtake me and my voice would shake or I'd cry (part of why I dance more than sing).

    PS: And don't just have the daddy/daughter dance; do a mother/son dance - she carried him 9 mos so you could eventually have him, give them 5 minutes too ;-) (Suggested song "Through the Years" Kenny Rogers - all the parentals and children can dance to it)
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